Matthew 19:9 NASB
9 “And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”[1]
The ESV Study Bible Note:
19:9 Every phrase in this verse is important for understanding Jesus’ teaching on divorce. whoever divorces his wife. “Divorces” is Greek apoluō, which always means “divorce” in contexts concerning marriage. Some commentators have claimed that apoluō means “separates from, sends away” in this verse (implying separation but not divorce), but this is not persuasive because (a) this word has not been shown to include the sense of “separate” in any other contexts concerning marriage and (b) the same word clearly means “divorce” in the Pharisees’ question in v. 3 (the current dispute among Jewish rabbis was about divorce, not separation), and therefore it should be understood to have the same meaning in Jesus’ response to their question in vv. 8 and 9. except for sexual immorality (Gk. porneia). (1) This implies that divorce and remarriage on the grounds of sexual immorality are not prohibited and thus do not constitute adultery. This is the one exception Jesus makes to the requirement that marriage be lifelong, for sexual immorality grievously defiles and indeed corrupts the “one flesh” union (v. 5). (2) The parallel passages in Mark 10:11–12 and Luke 16:18 omit “except for sexual immorality,” but that was probably because everyone, whatever their position in Jewish disputes over divorce (see note on Matt. 19:3), assumed that divorce was allowed in the case of adultery (i.e., the question of divorce because of adultery was not at issue in the immediate context in Mark 10 and Luke 16). But Matthew includes this fuller account of Jesus’ words, with the exception clause, perhaps to prevent any possible misunderstanding in other contexts, and perhaps to explicitly situate Jesus’ teaching within the context of the Jewish debates, for the benefit of his Jewish-Christian audience. (Also note that Matthew sometimes includes clarifying exceptions not included by Mark and Luke; e.g., Mark 8:12 quotes Jesus saying “no sign will be given to this generation,” whereas Matt. 16:4 says “no sign will be given to [this generation] except the sign of Jonah.”) (3) Some have claimed that porneia in this context refers to a very narrow, specific kind of sexual immorality, either sexual relations among close relatives or sexual immorality discovered during the betrothal period. Those who hold this position then argue that divorce in any other case is always prohibited, or else if divorce is allowed, remarriage is never allowed. But porneia had a broader range of meaning in ordinary usage, referring to any sexual intercourse that was contrary to the moral standards of Scripture, and nothing in this context would indicate that this should be understood in such a restricted sense (see note on 5:31–32). and marries another, commits adultery. (1) If a divorce is obtained for any reason other than (“except for”) sexual immorality, then the second marriage begins with adultery. Jesus is prohibiting divorce for the many trivial reasons that were used so frequently in the first century, leading to widespread injustice, especially for women whose husbands suddenly divorced them. (2) “And marries another” implies that the second marriage, though it begins with adultery, is still a marriage. Once a second marriage has occurred, it would be further sin to break it up. The second marriage should not be thought of as continually living in adultery, for the man and woman are now married to each other, not to anyone else. (3) If the exception (“sexual immorality”) occurs, then the implication is that remarriage to “another” does not constitute adultery and is therefore permissible. (4) Divorce, it must be remembered, is permitted but not required in the case of sexual immorality. Since God’s intention is that marriage should be for life (19:4–8), this provides good reason to make every reasonable effort to achieve restoration and forgiveness in marriage before taking steps to dissolve a marriage through divorce. This makes Jesus’ teaching fundamentally different from all of first-century Judaism, which required divorce in the case of adultery. (On the question of divorce and desertion, see 1 Cor. 7:15 and note.)[2]
[1] New American Standard Bible: 1995 Update (La Habra, CA: The Lockman Foundation, 1995), Mt 19:9.
[2] Crossway Bibles, The ESV Study Bible (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2008), 1860–1861.